Memories Haunt Us All [open]

[ℳintу]

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♀ Jadestar.
RiverClan Leader
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A swift breeze blew over the river, carrying up the scent of water and fish into the surrounding area. It was a fairly nice day out, the weather being very calm and not too hot for Greenleaf. In fact, it was truly a perfect day for a hunt or stroll along camp. One cat in particular had begun making a stroll in RiverClan's territory in the early morning. By now it had reached noon, and the cat slowly padded by the old, wooden bridge. One look at the feline and anyone would know who it was.

Jadestar hadn't got any good sleep the night before, despite the nice chilly nighttime weather in contrast to the previous day's heat. It seemed as though she was plagued by some infection of the mind; she had tossed and turned all through the night uneasily. As the sleek grey she-cat made her way cautiously to the bridge, her fur seemed to be fairly unsettled. Something had been on her mind as of late, and it was something she didn't dare share with her Clan. After all, she was supposed to be a strong leader - she couldn't let anything cloud her judgement or the Clan's opinion of her. She lifted a sigh.

So much had happened to Jadestar in several months. She had become deputy, quite a surprise to the young rascal, after her father's fateful passing. Although she was used to being alone, especially sans parents, that was not the issue here. Strange things had been happening when she became deputy. Runningstar began to act in an odd manner that sometimes made her fur stand on end. She wasn't sure what had really been going on in RiverClan, and she wished to be informed. There was an unsettling feeling as strange things seemed to be happening around the Clan. More cats had caught normal diseases which execrated into their deaths; then there was Crowsnarl. That baffled her most - Runningstar had exiled him without consulting her, and she was once again left in the dark. Runningstar had often told her not to worry about such dark matters, to which she protested. It never did any good, and Runningstar kept the secret to his death.

The images of her dreams had been horrible that they really should have been called nightmares. Every night the past three moons she had seen it - Runningstar's strong frame sliding into the gorge, out of her own reach, sailing under the current to his death. She could remember his cries clearly; he struggled so much to no avail. No one could have saved him, she tried to tell herself to regain her own sanity, but part of her was too suspicious. Many cats in the Clan had suggested he had fallen during a raid from ThunderClan which took the lives of other cats, including the powerful Runningfoot. Jadestar knew RiverClan had its secrets, and she desperately wished to figure them all out - even if that meant learning things she would have nightmares of.

Jadestar sat down near the bridge, staring out at the churning waters. Maybe she should believe the other Clan cats - they were there that day, after all. It was possible that they had seen him trip and fall, but Jadestar was skeptical. She attempted to shake the thoughts from her mind as she began to casually groom her fur free of dirt.

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[˚Reason˚]

Tawnywing's paws hit the wet earth like the rhythm of a bird's sweet song. The RiverClan warriror's tail was also swishing in the same beat as she walked gently next to the equally calm waters. Her eyes were entranced by the waters that held sneakily hidden fish that would make any RiverClan cat's stomach ache with hunger and urge their paws for a merry chase, but not Tawnywing. The she cat was in a mellow mood for the day and would much rather just continue on her calming walk; StarClan knows, she needed it.

Tawnywing sighed quietly to herself and came to a stop on the banks of the river. She sat down on her hunches and curled in on herself; her body mimicking her own heart. Her heart seemed smaller ever since Crowsnarl was banished from the clan and Tawnywing mourned silently within her own clan, and when things became too much she would seek refuge where most of her clan felt safe, near the water. Tawnywing glanced at her reflection that mostly imitated her aquamarine eyes. She continued to gaze into them until a stray ripple distorted the image causing her to frown. The she cat licked soundly at her pelt, lost in thought. She sat there for some time, just cleaning her tawny fur half-heartedly.

Tawnywing's ear twitched, then her head rose sharply to gaze at another she cat not too far from where she sat. She tilted her head curiously, wondering why the clan leader, Jadestar, would be outside of camp at such a time. Wincing from the glare from the water, the she cat got to her paws before hesitating. The leader looked like she was in deep thought. Taking a few paw steps forward, Tawnywing stopped again, her eyes stuck on the rather sad image of the clan leader. She was hesitant of talking to the jade-eyed cat but gathered her courage; Jadestar was after all, just a she cat; and all she cat need another she cat to confide in at times.

Tawnywing slowly padded up from behind the leader before taking her place smoothly beside the leader of RiverClan. "Jadestar? Are ya alright? You look like you need someone t' talk to." Tawnywing inquired lightly, giving the she cat a chance to back out of the conversation, but secretly hoping she wouldn't, it would made Tawnywing's heart ache if she left her leader in such a condition of turmoil.

[ℳintу]

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♀ Jadestar.
RiverClan Leader
»}

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The grey she-cat's attention broke away from the solitary waves as she noticed there was someone by her side. Her green eyes widened in shock for a moment - she had been completely lost in thought that she hadn't heard Tawnywing coming. A small chuckle rose from her throat as she felt foolish to be caught so offguard. She was Riverclan's leader and here she was, daydreaming and leaving herself wide open. She silently thanked that another Clan hadn't taken advantage of that.

"Oh, I'm fine," she lied as she bowed her head to the young warrior, a smile on her face. Of course she wasn't fine. She had a Clan of cats to always worry about, not to mention the constant reminder of the previous leader's death in her mind. It bothered her greatly that Runningstar should have died facing off ThunderClan cats. Secretly, she felt the desire to fight for Sunningrocks - for Runningstar had loved that land so much - in respect for his memory. Of course, once more, she wouldn't tell any cat that was what was on her mind as of late. At least not yet.

Tawnywing was truly a kindhearted cat, and Jadestar adored that about her. She had a comforting air about her - as if you could truly tell her anything that was on your mind. Jadestar contemplated for a moment. She did wish to confide in Tawnywing, she really did, but she was also a bit afraid on the inside. Leaders were supposed to be strong, and she didn't wish to look weak in front of any of her Clan mates - mostly not to worry them. Giving another glance at Tawnywing, she forfeited with herself.

"Actually, there is something bothering me," she began, shifting her jade-colored eyes back to the rushing waters. "It's about Runningstar. It's been bothering me lately - nightmares and the sort - about how he died. I was right there, but I couldn't do a thing. What an awful deputy I was," she meowed, mixed emotions involved. At the end she let out a chuckle, trying to be lighthearted, but her eyes showed much inner pain that she didn't convey in her tone. Her glance shifted up to the sky and clouds as she took a breath, thinking once again.

"There's something strange going on in RiverClan, but I don't know what it is. Call me suspicious or foolish, but I can't shake the feeling. I feel that Runningstar wasn't supposed to die in that battle. He wasn't supposed to fall into the gorge. I feel. . .," she meowed, pausing for a moment to choose her words. ". . like there was foul play."

Her eyes stared blindly into the distance for a moment before she shook herself and turned to glance at Tawnywing once again. "But that's silly, isn't it? Of course there were many witnesses. . .maybe I'm just too nervous with being leader," she meowed with an awkward laugh and a forced smile at Tawnywing.

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[˚Reason˚]

Tawnywing
Warrior of RiverClan

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Tawnywing's ears flattened to the back of her head at the look on her leaders face. She was genuinely surprised by her presence, goes to show how deep in thought her leader really was. Her posture relaxed as her leader's did, thankful that she didn't offend Jadestar in anyway. She smiled at her leader's chuckle and raised her head to look her leader in the eyes, sending her a reassuring smile.

Tawnywing's tail drooped slightly at Jadestar's first words, the smile carried a great weight behind it that Tawnywing could plainly see. The she cat straightened her shoulders to sit confidently beside her leader. She let a little hum like purr out of her maw to show she didn't believe her words, but was respectful enough not to call her out on it.

Thoughtlessly, Tawnywing dipped on of her paws into the cool waters to soothe her paw pads that seemed to constantly ache for water. The she cat swished her tail in time with her paw as she batted at a brilliantly colored leaf on the surface of the water. It was a bright green color that matched Jadestar's eyes. Tawnywing's eyes furrowed in thought as she glanced at the sky. Her thoughts strayed to StarClan, were they watching right now? Flicking the thoughts away like an irritating fly, Tawnywing scooped the leaf out of the water and deposited it on the bridge in front of her. Tawnywing blinked as a bright red bug with black spots climbed from under the leaf on to the top of the leaf. Tawnywing offered her paw to the bug to crawl on, wondering if the insect would take it. It did, the bright red bug circled her paw once before opening its wings and taking off on a cool breeze. Tawnywing's aquamarine eyes followed its progress until it disappeared from her sight.

Tawnywing looked up sharply at Jadestar as she spoke once more, and her eyes softened, glad her fellow she cat would get some of her thoughts out. The tawny she cat listened until her leader stopped talking then gazed sadly at her leader. She didn't know Jadestar had such thoughts, but she was still rather young and Runningstar had been special to her. Of course she was going to have such thoughts about a cat that was taken from her so suddenly. "Oh Jadestar, I'm sorry, I had no idea." Tawnywing murmured, licking the she cat comfortingly on the shoulder.
"Those nightmares are understandable, ya don't have to be ashamed of them. All cats 'em nightmares when they lose someone they love..." The she cat trailed off, her eyes growing distant as she put her paw upon the still wet leaf so it wouldn't fly away. Her mind conjured up an image of Crowsnarl, but she brushed them away, right now was time to help Jadestar, not dwell on the past. Taking a breath to steady herself, she continued. "I'm sure Runningstar treasured you as a deputy and is proud of the amazing leader you have become. If you have become so worried about RiverClan's future, I think it would be best to consult StarClan. I find sanctuary with StarClan when I am troubled. Maybe speaking to Shadownose or even going to Highstones may help. As for Runningstar's death, maybe you could visit the site where he died and you may remember something about how he was acting that day or anything else wrong." Tawnywing meowed smiling faintly to try and soothe Jadestar's thoughts some.

[ℳintу]

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♀ Jadestar.
RiverClan Leader
»}

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The dark grey she-cat's eyes stared at Tawnywing with warmth. Even a genuine smile crept across her maw. Tawnywing was truly understanding of her, and she now realized that she could easily confide in the sweet warrior. A sigh of relief escaped her lips as Tawnywing spoke, and Jadestar did feel comforted. She accepted the shoulder lick with ease, which actually calmed her down much more than she would have thought. She really had been quite on edge before Tawnywing had arrived.

Jadestar liked to hear Tawnywing's compliments, as selfish as that may sound. She knew Tawnywing was right, though, as Runningstar would have not picked just any cat to be his deputy. There would always be a deep pain in her heart for losing Runningstar, but now she felt as if she had some closure. There were still many things going on in RiverClan that the she-cat did not know about, and that scared her, but she decided to try and push such depressing thoughts from her mind. She needed to be a leader now, not some anxiety-prone half of a cat.

"Thank you, Tawnywing," she meowed with a deep bow. She was certainly thankful, that was certain.

"I think I may speak to Shadownose about it - or go to Highstones. You're right that I should consult our ancestors. Heaven knows Runningstar will be up there and offer me something or some knowledge to ease my nerves!" The smile on the she-cat's lips was comical, but was genuine as well.

Her thoughts shifted for a moment on Tawnywing. She was a young, pretty warrior with a lot of history in RiverClan. Jadestar knew that Crowsnarl, her sister's mentor who had always been seen with her, had been banished many moons ago when Runningstar was in charge. Although Jadestar wasn't ever told of the circumstances as to why Crowsnarl was forced to leave, she assumed it had left a large imprint on Tawnywing and Dappledcoat both.

"How have you been, Tawnywing?" the leader meowed in a serious tone while looking at the she-cat. She didn't mention Crowsnarl or her sister, as Jadestar didn't want to pry where she didn't need to. Seeing as Tawnywing had allowed her to confide, Jadestar at least wanted to offer an ear if Tawnywing had any concerns or tough days as of late. Of course, if she didn't wish to speak of it Jadestar would leave it at that.

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[˚Reason˚]

Tawnywing bowed her head to Jadestar and replied with a quiet meow. "You're welcome."

She then turned a smile to Jadestar, glad she was taking her advice. "I'm sure he will!" She meowed positively. The she cat shifted under gaze of Jadestar, unused to the intent attention of the she cat. Tawnywing distracted herself by the leaf that she still held captive under her paw. She slid her claws out and gently skewered the leaf and watched the green juices from the leaf ooze over her claws. Tawnywing perked up at Jadestar's question before deflating slightly. She knew that Jadestar was asking about her situation. The she cat lifted her paw, but the leaf had stuck to it with the stick juices.

Tawnywing's face flashed with embarrassment as she shook her paw vigorously to rid her self of the leaf. It took a moment before Tawnywing just used her teeth to rip off the leaf with a small nervous laugh. She bowed her head, her fur flushing at the kit-like display before focusing once again on the question.

The she cat shot Jadestar a fake smile, fully intent on just answering with a quick 'fine' but thought better of it. She sighed, placing her paw on the ground again and using it to draw little circles on the wood. "I'm not okay... but I think I will be." She answered shortly, still not looking Jadestar in the eye. "I mean," She started again, looking anywhere but at Jadestar. "it has been a while since it happened but it still hurt to think about him. I still miss him. Well... maybe miss isn't the right word." She meowed, glancing at her paws, her face warming up even further. Maybe pine might work better. Or ache. She thought idly as her chest twisted itself like a snake before striking warm poison in her veins that made her fur heat up even more.

The she cat sighed to herself, finally looking up at Jadestar with a shy smile. "That sounds silly doesn't it? What I should be more worried about is Dappledcoat." Her thoughts quickly turned more pleasant as she thought fondly of her sister. She blinked her eyes before swishing her tail thoughtfully. Tawnywing hadn't seen Dappledcoat in a while, maybe if she talked to Dappledcoat it might soothe her mind? Deciding that she would share tongue with her sister when she got back to camp she turned her attention out wards to Jadestar.

[ℳintу]

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Jadestar could tell by the look on Tawnywing's face, not to mention her battle with the stray leaf, that the she-cat was deeply troubled. She knew that Crowsnarl and Tawnywing had been quite close, even more so than Dappledcoat, his former apprentice. She offered the she-cat a look of deep sympathy. It must have been terribly hard for her to cope, and Jadestar knew this. Although she didn't know why Runningstar had banished Crowsnarl, she felt she had to disagree with the former leader's judgement. Crowsnarl had been an odd cat, but never menacing to her or others. She couldn't imagine what he must have done to get expelled so vastly. She could see the poor, sweet she-cat in front of herself looking torn apart by the mere memory of Crowsnarl. The leader now regretted bringing up the former Clan mate, for she hated to see any cat, Tawnywing no less, look so desperate and emotional. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything," the dark grey she-cat murmured, warmth overflowing in her voice. She bent forward and gave Tawnywing what she hoped was a reassuring lick on her forehead. She wanted to wash away the bad thoughts and help her warrior think of happier times. Both she-cats seemed to be rather down lately. "Why don't you have a chat with Dappledcoat? She seems rather disheveled lately, what with her new apprentice," she meowed the suggestion at Tawnywing, a smile covering her maw gently.

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